we’re scared.
after a long, not-too-heated disagreement about how to spend a chunk of money this afternoon we both acknowledged that the crux of what we’re really feeling is panic.
it’s a simple case of “it looks like this baby might really be born; what the hell do we do now?”
panic.
please note: this panic does not equal regret or ambivalence re: the baby i’m carrying. it is however deeply connected to our mutual fear of the unknown and of major changes.
both of which will come knocking on our door the moment our little bundle is delivered into our eager arms.
nothing about becoming first-time parents to a living baby will be easy, but we’re holding on to the hope that all the moms and dads who’ve gone before us are telling the truth……..all the fear of change and unknowns in the world doesn’t hold a candle to the joy and depth of love one feels the instant the little bundle of joy arrives.
and we desperately hope this little bundle does just that….arrives.
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September 7, 2009 at 8:58 pm
Kate
I hope you guys figure it all out soon but more importantly I hope the baby arrives like you said. I think its okay to worry about the future and still be happy about your arriving bundle 🙂
September 9, 2009 at 4:50 pm
MEG.
Any major life changes bring panic with them. For me, change has always equaled PANIC. Your feelings are not unnatural, in the slightest.
And even though I’m not a parent, I 150% believe that the panic melts away the first time you see your baby.
Thinking of you often!